A Year to Clear

As is par for the course on a New Years Day, I slept in. Thankfully, I remembered to turn off my alarm, and at 10am, I awoke, with crusty eyes, swollen hands, and an internal panic of all that I “have” to do.

Insert big EXHALE here.

Let me start over. I know 2016 is going to be big. 2015 was huge. I let go of a lot and brought in so much that I now don’t have enough hours in the day to do all that I brought into my life and would LOVE to do! It’s a real problem, folks.

I wake up, and my mind starts with, you “should” do yoga. That’s a healthy way to start the day, every day. You shouldn’t drink coffee. It’s hard on your adrenals. You really should go play on your pole. Don’t sit down on the computer right away without stretching and being active first. And on and on… I think I have an internal mother on overdrive.

And then I think of all that I want to DO in my life.

  • I want to dance more, like full dancing, with jumps and leaps, and performing, and pirouettes, and floorwork, and all the pain and beauty I remember.
  • Oh, and I have a pole downstairs that I want to learn to use, but for some reason am not.
  • I want to write more, so I think a daily blog again would be good.
  • I started a fellowship, so I know I need to study.
  • Of course, I want to somehow turn that into a business where I actually help people be healthier, vs. approve medications that are prescribed by other people and that I know are making them sicker.
  • Oh, and I want to be healthy and strong, so I want to keep up the workouts in the gym, and of course the meal prepping.
  • Perhaps I might do a figure competition as well.
  • Somewhere in there, I really want to have more close relationships with people. Yet I am reticent to have a relationship outside of myself. I want to let people in….slowly.
  • I want to clear the clutter in my home….starting with the file drawer full of things to file…and I need to download my quicken for the YEAR and figure out what is biz and not…and organize so I can study, so my heartrate doesn’t quicken in panic every time I walk in the office….
  • And all of those things take Time, …and Focus…. and Presence.

And yet, I am remembering going through some of my old posts last night after coming back from New Years festivities. So many of the posts are about Surrendering to the unknown, to letting the current image of things as we think they should be fall away. They are about Trust, Self Love, and BEing.

So, I sit down with my coffee, open up my computer, and this page is looking at me (which I opened last night)

A Year to Clear What is Holding You Back!
Premium on-line course by Stephanie Bennett Vogt
(9,538 people have taken this course)
 

This is a 365-day on-line course available from Stephanie Bennett Vogt. We will email you when your new lesson is available and you will be able to login and read each lesson on-line or print as they become available and click to listen to the guided audio meditations. Your first lesson will be available immediately after you enroll.

“The journey is the treasure.”-Lloyd Alexander

 

Well, I took it as a sign, and I signed up. Part of me thought, “Amy, there you go committing to yet one more thing,” and the other part of me said, “It needs to happen. It will help me focus on what is most important each day, help me in seeing that I don’t have to do it all every day, that it’s ok to let some things go so other things can come in.”

So, no New Years Resolutions, except maybe to ALLOW my Self to be all that I imagine and more, or less than I imagine, and to trust that letting go of what I imagine will allow something I cannot imagine because it is a whole new way of being.

I like the sound of that!

What is on your mind as we head into 2016? 

 

 

 

Days of Clarity

I am sitting here doing The Work, listening to videos, trying to go through thoughts and understand them. I have had some days of great happiness and clarity lately, in the midst of personal chaos. They are interspersed with crazy thoughts, sad thoughts, etc, but they are there.

I told my friend today it’s like there is this new trickle of goodness coming in, this golden stream coming in to my being. Like a new path of water, it is starting small, but as it wears away at the coarse soil in my mind and soul, it will grow, and eventually it will flow through my heart and straight out.

When I see the pond now, I love it. I don’t get on myself for not having it perfect. It is perfect right now, and I see how it is thriving.
I notice the landscape more, and when I water my plants, I don’t have the thoughts that I should have done a better job. I just am amazed at all of the bees on the basil, bees-and-basil-2and how the flowers are blooming, and how cool it is that the bunnies like those few plants so much, that they ate them down to the nubs.

The other night during the full moon, I sat out on the patio listening to my daughter sing and play the keyboard, very late at night. Not long ago, I would have thought she should be getting sleep. Instead, I sat and reveled in the beauty of my one and only daughter, singing so sweetly below. How beautiful to hear her soul pour out her windows!

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135- My Own Best Friend

Learning, yet again, how important it is to be your own best friend. The more you trust yourself, the more you can trust yourself with others. They are unpredictable, but if you can set safe boundaries for yourself, you can trust yourself to act in your best interest, no matter what.

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65- Hidden Connections Part One

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“A hidden connection is stronger than an obvious one.” ~Heraclitus (c.536-470 BC)  When one is open to the possibilities of interpersonal connection and does not judge, the possibilities are endless. I experienced deep connection with people both last night and … Continue reading

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