Recorded January 2017…. while driving in the pouring rain…

I just realized that when I get where I’m going, I don’t know what to do with it. That I delight in the journey and the struggle, but that I am not sure how to sustain what I DO have. I’m just good at getting it. Because I have this pharmacy department..pretty much, not completely, and I’m feeling like…”eh, I’m done”.

And I can kind of see that pattern in my life where I don’t quite know how to hold what I have, or at least it seems like that. I’m sitting here kind of complacent, wondering “what’s next?” ……. waiting to be cracked open again, amazingly enough. Cuz that’s so hard, but I feel it’s time. There’s something else……I want to feel again. It’s been too long.