Following is a comment from a devoted reader:
One ‘teacher’, John DeRuiter said: ‘You’ve been using your energy, your life-force, to hold together a false construct of yourself, of your identity. Just take your hands OFF… and those constructs will begin falling away… and it will be good… and what will be left remaining is that which is SELF-SUSTAINING… that which doesn’t need your energy to hold it together.’ [So then it will be much easier to relax… and relaxation is the most important aspect of an honest, balanced, aware existence].
I have been holding together so much in my life that wasn’t my true passion, and the facade is gradually getting cut away. Well, it’s not gradual. It’s all actually pretty drastic. Amazingly enough, I feel such a freedom from the expectations to perform in a capacity I don’t see as sustainable, at least not for me. I am looking at possibly living off of minimal unemployment while I try and kick-start my consulting and find a full-time job. In the meanwhile, I have time to devote to those in need.
I went to a local shelter tonight and offered my services to people needing help with their medications. I am thrilled at the thought of being able to help without worrying about whether I will get paid or not. The shelter is right next to a prison, so that might be somewhere to go as well. Sure, I have bills to pay and a daughter to take care of, but I am excited at the opportunities presented when all the societal obligations are cleared away, and all I am left with is myself and an open road.