14- When Life Throws Curve Balls

I certainly don’t claim to be a spiritual guru, nor even very knowledgeable about the practices I am so interested in. I am a novice, single mother and young professional, working my way slowly, daily, toward being more clear and true to myself, and hence others.

It is my hope that by sharing my experiences, from challenging to triumphant, others will benefit.

Life has thrown me some really big curveballs lately. My basic security has been threatened by people whom I trusted and respected, despite the fact that my intent has always been to make sure that the other person is benefiting as much or more than I. With each blow, I am learning to pause before I take action, and this last incidence is forcing me to really STOP and breathe.

Lately, I have been focused on living Pono (Hawaiian term for righteousness), which has been translated many ways, but it infers harmony, balance. I have made efforts to be transparent in all of my interactions out of respect for myself and others. I have entered both my daughter and myself in counseling. It is a huge commitment to US, and it was definitely the right thing to commit to, regardless of my situation. Actually, it has helped me deal with all that is going on, and I can’t help but acknowledge the serendipity of the timing of finding and entering this program.

Yet, with all the changes I have made toward being more balanced, giving, and true to myself, people around me are adversely affecting my job security, my shelter, my career, and hence my family. Once one situation feels remedied, or at least my response has been resolved, another situation crops up that directly threatens my, and my daughter’s, most basic securities.

It is getting harder and harder for me to understand what all this means in the context of where I need to be in life. Perhaps I need to be more of service to others, yet that is hard to do when I am busy putting out fires that threaten to turn my life upside down.

When you have felt you were making positive changes, but that life kept throwing road blocks in your way, what did you do? How did you remain balanced, and what did you learn about you and your life?

I ask because I could really use some guidance and perspective!

Mahalo for reading. Please share your insight!